My Dear blog,
I hope that this fine and sunny Thursday finds you in good spirits?
I am in a slightly euphoric mood (read manically positive), because my reliance on Mestinon the drug that alleviates the symptoms of MG is dwindling fast as the steroids do their job.
On a steroid day I now only seem to need between 2 and 4 tablets and on non steroid days no more than 4.
The maximum dose of 7.5 tablets was a regular dose not long ago and as I take them up to this limit on an 'as needed' basis they remain a good indicator of what level of symptom I am facing.
To help me decide whether the MG had finished my contest career a couple of weeks ago I entered a small competition in Salisbury, entering the masters U90kg section. In retrospect it was an unrealistic test of my
reduced potential as I had not trained for a couple of months I had dropped a lot of weight in a short period and having sweated off the last Kilo in the sauna to make weight at 9am I then had to wait until 4pm to compete. With only 3 fights available in my group I agreed to fight an Under 100kg and an over 100kg competitor. This was ok in pricipal but they made my first fight the fatty open weight person.
I use the term person in a loose fashion scowling bristly tub of lard would be more accurate.
He had very strong and negative Judo with very little in the way of attacking technique.
I should have opened him up with movement and a high tempo but rustiness on my part meant that I attacked with an overly optimistic shoulder throw which he blocked so forcefully I damaged my left elbow.
Unable to grip with my left hand a difficult task became impossible and I lost to a hold down., submitting rather than suffer the indignity of laying under a beached whale. The next fight was against the U100kg fighter* *(note the term fighter not 'player' a term now seemingly adopted by commentators and even coaches in some misguided attempt to make judo feel more like other sports, boxers don't 'play' boxing they do it. Footballers don't 'do' football they play it. while I'm still in brackets FFS please stop calling Judoka or if you like Judo fighters 'athletes', it is a crass dumbing down and plays to the idea that we should broaden its appeal to get more money into it. They presumably think that if they can blur the edges enough it might at some point become as popular as track and field events, it wont by the way. To enjoy judo it is necessary to invest time in understanding it, educating the audience might be a better idea. Failing this I am determined to start a campaign devoted to changing the term 'athlete' where applied to track and field into 'fighters' long jumpers will be known as 'long jump fighters'. There.... perhaps my longest use of brackets ever, now where was I? Nurse..... Nurse...I need help!). and club mate Geoff Torrington within seconds I realised that I was still unable to grip effectivly and with nothing to gain from a protracted battle, I whispered to him that I was about to gift him his 2nd Dan by way of a 'jump'. He threw me with a low Seoi Nage that I underlined with an enormous breakfall. This got a round of applause from the audience and.... to my shame, I wanted to shout at all of them and explain that I had jumped (still the spoilt over competitive child at heart),
any way I didn't
explain....
and he did,
get his remaining 10 points against a higher grade and his second Dan.
So that's all right then?
NO OF COURSE IT ISN'T!
I was so depressed that my competitive judo was at an end that I made the mistake of posting my thoughts on Facebook. This got got so many people telling me to fight on / get a grip / man up etc.
It was as far as I was concerned a decision being forced on me by this disease, after 43 years and with coaching my priority was it really such a bad idea to stop, was it not my business (yes so why put on a public message board then)? The fact is now that I have had chance to digest all of this, I think that there were too many things in the mix for me to be able to make a reasonable decision about post MG competition. So take out the other factors .... train and prepare for the Nationals at my new weight... make the weight before the event not on the day....refuse to fight out of my weight group unless ()crucially) its after my U90kg fights.
Last night at Pinewood Judo Club I felt really alive in a way that is difficult to explain, I think it
was probably that I was, for the first time practicing judo in a 'normal' non diseased way. I honestly couldn't notice any of the weakness or fuzziness that MG brings. This made me feel like I was boosted beyond normal, to a higher level. My long time friend and judo training partner Paul Knight said he could feel no evidence of the disease in me either and said he thought it had "gone away".
It made me realise that, when you have trained for 43 years on a weekly basis with someone, you get to know their body through movement almost as an extension of your own.
My weight reduction (sorry GP your predicted moon face and steroid weight gain is still nowhere to be seen)
has made me more mobile and add that to my normality high and I was on fire in Randori (free sparring).... not literally on fire of course, that would be silly
Watching the Judo World Championships which are being live streamed from Rio has been fantastic over the last few days and.... having flirted with MMA and BJJ (mixed martial arts and Brazilian Jui Jitsu)
the pause forced on me by MG gave me a great chance to step back and consider everything objectively.
Now, tired of acronyms I have returned to my one true love.....
JUDO!
shout it from the mountain tops
JUDO!
spray it on car park walls
JUDO!
tattoo it on your foreheads
So with only three weeks left to the Nationals and one embarrassing performance in Salisbury to put away
watch this space.
Now back to Rio........
Thursday, 29 August 2013
Wednesday, 14 August 2013
Chapter 18 Three days and counting......
Hello old friend,
Having just checked I realise that I have not been drawn to 'blog' (who thought that name up, it sounds like something that happens in your pants) since August 3rd.
Given that I use it generally as a crutch to relieve myself of frustration... (ooh er, is it me or have I dropped into some 'Carry On Blogging' double entendre fest).
I digress... essentially.... and to cut to the chase........ (without further recourse to brackets)
The last couple of weeks have been unremarkable, (which is remarkable)
bollocks these brackets are like Tourrettes.
My great Neurologist Doctor Armstrong (I feel slightly reticent about my effusive compliments now, as he may read this, but they are staying in, no apologies) has explained that my blood test confirmed what he told me as I walked into his office the first time we met, I have MG, he has well trained eyes, and was never in doubt.
I also heard that my scan indicated no abnormality of my Thymus gland which is a relief.
My ill informed hopes for a Thymectomy (spell check makes that Historectomy, I'll try it if it helps)
were both ill informed and premature, I am improving so quickly there are moments when I forget that I have anything wrong with me. Like last Saturday night at a wedding reception without Mestinon....
I forgot it as I felt so well and the MG came knocking by way of my nasal slurring speech impediment.
It was like a stroll down memory lane for me and got me feeling all nostalgic for the good old days..... NOT
I think most people assumed I was pissed, which was fine and dandy because I didn't really know them well,
I will just decay in their memory as "that bloke with the funny eyes, you know, the pissed one".
I wasn't by the way... I'll have you know!
Steroids have not, as yet, produced the much anticipated balloon face, so I may have to throw away my North Korean General's Uniform (check Chapter 9 and keep up please).
I took the promised weight gain as a challenge from my GP who, when I last saw him, looked almost annoyed that his prediction had not, as yet come to pass....
"oh you will eventually",
he said..
"oh ok"
I said
(f!ck you")
I thought.
So with my weight at a slender 91.6 kg and my deadline of Sunday for U90 kg all is looking good
for my first post MG contest. If it goes ok then I shall enter the Nationals in September and of course jump up and down like a small child shouting with excitement. With limits on my endurance and outright strength, I shall have to make sure my Judo is good and try and win quickly. Sounds easy enough written like that.
See I managed without brackets there (so far, thinks the dear reader) DOH!
I'm just messing about now, I can give up brackets whenever I choose OK......?
I am just a social bracket user, I think the government should legalise them and tax them using the revenue raised to help problem bracket users get clean and put their lives back together.
I'm ashamed to say that having given up smoking a long time back, my childish reaction to my diagnosis
was to light a cigarette.
"OK I tried healthy", went the perverse and twisted logic "look where that got me".
Lets try the debilitating disease with a life threatening habit combo shall we kids?
I quickly realised that an important shift had happened in my consciousness, whilst chasing fitness I had changed the way I saw myself.
This meant that rather than taking up smoking, I felt I was giving something up, relinquishing something fundamental about the way I saw myself. It has been a huge relief to stop again and begin feeling positive
about myself almost immediately.
They stink...and it stinks, people earn millions from killing their customers.. (that stinks).
I'm taking up brackets.
Love love love and a weeny bit of fightyness please
Having just checked I realise that I have not been drawn to 'blog' (who thought that name up, it sounds like something that happens in your pants) since August 3rd.
Given that I use it generally as a crutch to relieve myself of frustration... (ooh er, is it me or have I dropped into some 'Carry On Blogging' double entendre fest).
I digress... essentially.... and to cut to the chase........ (without further recourse to brackets)
The last couple of weeks have been unremarkable, (which is remarkable)
bollocks these brackets are like Tourrettes.
My great Neurologist Doctor Armstrong (I feel slightly reticent about my effusive compliments now, as he may read this, but they are staying in, no apologies) has explained that my blood test confirmed what he told me as I walked into his office the first time we met, I have MG, he has well trained eyes, and was never in doubt.
I also heard that my scan indicated no abnormality of my Thymus gland which is a relief.
My ill informed hopes for a Thymectomy (spell check makes that Historectomy, I'll try it if it helps)
were both ill informed and premature, I am improving so quickly there are moments when I forget that I have anything wrong with me. Like last Saturday night at a wedding reception without Mestinon....
I forgot it as I felt so well and the MG came knocking by way of my nasal slurring speech impediment.
It was like a stroll down memory lane for me and got me feeling all nostalgic for the good old days..... NOT
I think most people assumed I was pissed, which was fine and dandy because I didn't really know them well,
I will just decay in their memory as "that bloke with the funny eyes, you know, the pissed one".
I wasn't by the way... I'll have you know!
Steroids have not, as yet, produced the much anticipated balloon face, so I may have to throw away my North Korean General's Uniform (check Chapter 9 and keep up please).
I took the promised weight gain as a challenge from my GP who, when I last saw him, looked almost annoyed that his prediction had not, as yet come to pass....
"oh you will eventually",
he said..
"oh ok"
I said
(f!ck you")
I thought.
So with my weight at a slender 91.6 kg and my deadline of Sunday for U90 kg all is looking good
for my first post MG contest. If it goes ok then I shall enter the Nationals in September and of course jump up and down like a small child shouting with excitement. With limits on my endurance and outright strength, I shall have to make sure my Judo is good and try and win quickly. Sounds easy enough written like that.
See I managed without brackets there (so far, thinks the dear reader) DOH!
I'm just messing about now, I can give up brackets whenever I choose OK......?
I am just a social bracket user, I think the government should legalise them and tax them using the revenue raised to help problem bracket users get clean and put their lives back together.
I'm ashamed to say that having given up smoking a long time back, my childish reaction to my diagnosis
was to light a cigarette.
"OK I tried healthy", went the perverse and twisted logic "look where that got me".
Lets try the debilitating disease with a life threatening habit combo shall we kids?
I quickly realised that an important shift had happened in my consciousness, whilst chasing fitness I had changed the way I saw myself.
This meant that rather than taking up smoking, I felt I was giving something up, relinquishing something fundamental about the way I saw myself. It has been a huge relief to stop again and begin feeling positive
about myself almost immediately.
They stink...and it stinks, people earn millions from killing their customers.. (that stinks).
I'm taking up brackets.
Love love love and a weeny bit of fightyness please
Saturday, 3 August 2013
Chapter 17 Steady as she goes....
Dr Jigoro Kano the person who devised Judo wrote "At the Kodokan we study and practice techniques with the purpose of using mental and physical energy most effectively in order to achieve one's goals no matter what the endeavor, which is the basic principal of judo."
What a smart man....
Despite 43 years doing judo and now 4 years teaching it full time it took MG to force me to use a judo approach to my life.
For some people age or disability forces them to consider physical tasks in a different way.
I have been getting stronger on an almost daily basis now for about a week, and whilst this could be a false dawn it is encouraging.
My strength and endurance is still a long way from where it was and probably always will be, but my new way of approaching things is just so much more efficient.
I have just unloaded and carried my judo mats from my van to the shed, BMG (before MG) this would have been a frantic 10 at a time crashing of the walls sweating and swearing event, completed in maybe 15 minutes,
AMG (after MG) It was a 5 at a time serene stroll leaving me space to think.
I took the time to carefully re-arrange the shed, nothing got in my way or fell over whilst I placed the mats, I even found time to carry a few zeppelin sized bumble bees out of the shed first.
Start to finish maybe 20 minutes, no sweat, no swearing....
Happy days thanks Jigoro and sorry I didn't listen.
I have to carry this efficiency into my thinking and everyday life which was always Dr Kano's bigger idea, he never considered that Judo was just another fighting art it was always intended to be so much more.
The 'Do' in judo in fact means way and the 'Ju' translates as efficient NOT gentle which is a common mistranslation..
My mum has understood this principal for years, forced by her arthritis to take things steadily,
I am reminded that, just prior to my diagnosis, I joined her in trying to clear moss from the terrace in her garden.
She was using a stick with a pointed piece of metal to dislodge one tiny lump at a time.
I suggested that the whole job could be done so much faster with my jet washer (and it could Mum).
She refused explaining that this would cause too much mess and wash the moss onto the garden (and it would Mark).
At the time, standing there with a stiff broom and joining her, in what seemed like a ridiculous waste of time I was angry at what seemed like her inability to understand.
I am now reminded that it was me that didn't understand.
Didn't understand that there was no time limit,
Didn't understand that this was a great opportunity to work together
on something and talk.
Great judo mum.
My Sensei and long time friend is suffering from a serious illness and has asked me to cover his junior sessions in his abscence at Pinewood Judo Club.
It is a great honour to have his trust and I feel the weight of responsibilty for what is so dear to him.
It has been a challenge to fit this alongside all of my other responsibilities (judo and otherwise) but
I think I have made a reasonable job so far, with a self awarded 8 out of 10 last week and a slightly disappointing 5 out of 10 this week.
Sadly some children have left the club to train elsewhere before my Sensei's illness was diagnosed.
This initially angered me but in this, as everything else I have to think more in a more judo way.
I cannot help those that have exercised their free will to move elsewhere.
I should not judge them, I cannot see from their point of view.
I should not harbor resentment as this is self destructive.
I can concentrate all of my efforts in helping those that have shown respect and loyalty.
I can work hard to be a great coach.
I can make use all of the great judo talent available around the club.
Aaaaaand We can kick their arses somewhere when we meet them at a competition!
Did you think I had gone all hippy Zen on you again?
Peace baby but just a bit of fighting here and there please.
Despite 43 years doing judo and now 4 years teaching it full time it took MG to force me to use a judo approach to my life.
For some people age or disability forces them to consider physical tasks in a different way.
I have been getting stronger on an almost daily basis now for about a week, and whilst this could be a false dawn it is encouraging.
My strength and endurance is still a long way from where it was and probably always will be, but my new way of approaching things is just so much more efficient.
I have just unloaded and carried my judo mats from my van to the shed, BMG (before MG) this would have been a frantic 10 at a time crashing of the walls sweating and swearing event, completed in maybe 15 minutes,
AMG (after MG) It was a 5 at a time serene stroll leaving me space to think.
I took the time to carefully re-arrange the shed, nothing got in my way or fell over whilst I placed the mats, I even found time to carry a few zeppelin sized bumble bees out of the shed first.
Start to finish maybe 20 minutes, no sweat, no swearing....
Happy days thanks Jigoro and sorry I didn't listen.
I have to carry this efficiency into my thinking and everyday life which was always Dr Kano's bigger idea, he never considered that Judo was just another fighting art it was always intended to be so much more.
The 'Do' in judo in fact means way and the 'Ju' translates as efficient NOT gentle which is a common mistranslation..
My mum has understood this principal for years, forced by her arthritis to take things steadily,
I am reminded that, just prior to my diagnosis, I joined her in trying to clear moss from the terrace in her garden.
She was using a stick with a pointed piece of metal to dislodge one tiny lump at a time.
I suggested that the whole job could be done so much faster with my jet washer (and it could Mum).
She refused explaining that this would cause too much mess and wash the moss onto the garden (and it would Mark).
At the time, standing there with a stiff broom and joining her, in what seemed like a ridiculous waste of time I was angry at what seemed like her inability to understand.
I am now reminded that it was me that didn't understand.
Didn't understand that there was no time limit,
Didn't understand that this was a great opportunity to work together
on something and talk.
Great judo mum.
My Sensei and long time friend is suffering from a serious illness and has asked me to cover his junior sessions in his abscence at Pinewood Judo Club.
It is a great honour to have his trust and I feel the weight of responsibilty for what is so dear to him.
It has been a challenge to fit this alongside all of my other responsibilities (judo and otherwise) but
I think I have made a reasonable job so far, with a self awarded 8 out of 10 last week and a slightly disappointing 5 out of 10 this week.
Sadly some children have left the club to train elsewhere before my Sensei's illness was diagnosed.
This initially angered me but in this, as everything else I have to think more in a more judo way.
I cannot help those that have exercised their free will to move elsewhere.
I should not judge them, I cannot see from their point of view.
I should not harbor resentment as this is self destructive.
I can concentrate all of my efforts in helping those that have shown respect and loyalty.
I can work hard to be a great coach.
I can make use all of the great judo talent available around the club.
Aaaaaand We can kick their arses somewhere when we meet them at a competition!
Did you think I had gone all hippy Zen on you again?
Peace baby but just a bit of fighting here and there please.
Friday, 26 July 2013
Chapter 16 already. (In the accent of an east end Jewish ragtrader)
So try and get your prescription from the NHS whydontcha!
Feeling smug and organised for once,
I proudly handed over my carefully prepared request for a prescription and was congratulated on the
help I had given them.
I detailed each of the 6 drugs I take, and hear it is, as presented.....
Current Drug Treatment
The more observant of you will have noted that I ran out of Omeprazole on Wednesday, having visited yesterday and phoned today its now 'just' awaiting a signature.....
oh cool..... that's a relief I was thinking it might be delayed!!
What might have happened if I had just phoned them. (rhetorical question deserving no question mark).
My GP called last night me to discuss the dosage of Prednisolone steroid and Mistinon prescribed by my Neurologist.
I'm not sure what he thought I could bring to the debate,
but he clearly seemed to think that, the steroid in particular, was a high dose.
"At that dose you will certainly need regular blood tests" said he.
"Oh ok" said me....
(thinking that shouldn't take more than a couple of months to arrange then).
I didn't prescribe this stuff,
I didn't decide the dose,
My job and correct me if I'm wrong, is to try and swallow it.
This in itself is no easy task on some mornings.
At around £30 every time I need these prescriptions perhaps this protracted process is intended
to convince me of their value.
I feel aggrieved, mightily aggrieved!
Start a blog shout at the world like a child go on, go on, you know you should.
On a lighter note, and whatever the GP might think,
(G as in General, non specific, lacking the detailed understanding of a specialist, P as in practitioner, someone engaged in the regular practice of something esp medicine, well if he keeps practicing I'm sure he will get it eventually)
I believe the Neurologist has it right because the improvement is steady and on the days that I take steroids I feel absolutely normal.
I covered the intermediate and advanced sessions at Pinewood Judo Club last night a 4 hour haul and with no problems at all.
This weekend, on both Saturday and Sunday, I shall be coaching for our esteemed leader at a competition in Swindon followed by a judo camp I am running on Monday Tuesday and Wednesday next week!
Fortunately I will be able to lean on my fellow coaches Olly and Lynn on the judo camp.
If the drugs run out I might need to!
ps I'm bored
Feeling smug and organised for once,
I proudly handed over my carefully prepared request for a prescription and was congratulated on the
help I had given them.
I detailed each of the 6 drugs I take, and hear it is, as presented.....
Current Drug Treatment
Daily 20mg Omeprazole
3000mg Adcal
450mg Mestinon (Pyridostigme)
Alternate days
90mg Prednisolone
Remaining on 22/07/2013
60mg Omeprazole (3 days)
18000mg Adcal (6 days)
6789mg Mestinon (15 days)
545mg Prednisolone (12 days incl. ‘off’ days)The more observant of you will have noted that I ran out of Omeprazole on Wednesday, having visited yesterday and phoned today its now 'just' awaiting a signature.....
oh cool..... that's a relief I was thinking it might be delayed!!
What might have happened if I had just phoned them. (rhetorical question deserving no question mark).
My GP called last night me to discuss the dosage of Prednisolone steroid and Mistinon prescribed by my Neurologist.
I'm not sure what he thought I could bring to the debate,
but he clearly seemed to think that, the steroid in particular, was a high dose.
"At that dose you will certainly need regular blood tests" said he.
"Oh ok" said me....
(thinking that shouldn't take more than a couple of months to arrange then).
I didn't prescribe this stuff,
I didn't decide the dose,
My job and correct me if I'm wrong, is to try and swallow it.
This in itself is no easy task on some mornings.
At around £30 every time I need these prescriptions perhaps this protracted process is intended
to convince me of their value.
I feel aggrieved, mightily aggrieved!
Start a blog shout at the world like a child go on, go on, you know you should.
On a lighter note, and whatever the GP might think,
(G as in General, non specific, lacking the detailed understanding of a specialist, P as in practitioner, someone engaged in the regular practice of something esp medicine, well if he keeps practicing I'm sure he will get it eventually)
I believe the Neurologist has it right because the improvement is steady and on the days that I take steroids I feel absolutely normal.
I covered the intermediate and advanced sessions at Pinewood Judo Club last night a 4 hour haul and with no problems at all.
This weekend, on both Saturday and Sunday, I shall be coaching for our esteemed leader at a competition in Swindon followed by a judo camp I am running on Monday Tuesday and Wednesday next week!
Fortunately I will be able to lean on my fellow coaches Olly and Lynn on the judo camp.
If the drugs run out I might need to!
ps I'm bored
Sunday, 21 July 2013
chapter 15 no jokes here
This was saved as a draft yesterday on my phone and sums up how things can feel at the low points,
Laying on my bed recovering from an hour of what was meant to be a social with Geoff Torrington. poor Geoff hanging on every distorted syllable that I managed to drag from my diseased mouth.
Did I say felt was surfing in front of this tidal wave of symptoms? Well guess what I just got hit by the tidal wave. my right arm and hand are weakened as are my legs. trying to explain this to an old friend in the pub just now with my speech so badly affected left me depressed and him confused. where does this stop?
It is certainly giving me a kicking at the moment, I have never felt so fu*king tired and old. why the *?....... just say it shall we.... FUCKING... there you all know what meant anyway!
One hour to my CT scan so now to sleep perchance to dream
Now 12 hours later all much chirpier and fairly symptom free.
I had my scan and I am hoping that I might be considered for a Thymectomy (removal of my Thymus gland).
I seem to satisfy the criteria as this is a reasonably developed case of mg, I am healthy and under 60 years old.
Whilst I have read that this is not a cure, it does offer the possibility of reduced symptoms and drug therapy.
Although a serious operation, particularly if they go for complete removal (by opening at my sternum), with a long recovery time, I would be prepared to take the risk versus benefit gamble.
I surveyed the last part of my friend's pub yesterday in order to complete my first post mg drawing.
It feels strange to be drawing again after all that has happened and although I am slower at both measuring and drawing I can still do it.
So a small victory.
A small victory is not I am hoping for later today, when I go to see my friend 'Duggy' AKA Mark Douglas box someones lips off in Milton Keynes.
He is one seriously focused fighter who has recovered well from a dislocated shoulder suffered a couple of years ago during a fight at York Hall. He boxed on for a few minutes and continued to use his dislocated shoulder to punch!
This is his 3rd Pro comeback fight and all is looking good for him.
I wonder what draws me to martial arts (and yes boxing is a fine martial art), I think it is that life has become so sanitised, controlled and lacking in drama, that MMA Boxing Brazilian Jui Jitsu and of course Judo offer the kind of visceral excitement missing from daily existence.
There is a chance to really understand yourself at a fundamental level when you are tested in these circumstances and my stumbling return to practicing judo last Wednesday was, I hope my first step back to an eventual return to competition.
C'mon you steroids.......... (picks up an England flag and bare chested, with arms splayed begins throwing plastic chairs up a high street somewhere in Belgium)
Go Duggie go DUGGIE, DO IM SON......DO IM!
Zen Buddhism anyone?
Laying on my bed recovering from an hour of what was meant to be a social with Geoff Torrington. poor Geoff hanging on every distorted syllable that I managed to drag from my diseased mouth.
Did I say felt was surfing in front of this tidal wave of symptoms? Well guess what I just got hit by the tidal wave. my right arm and hand are weakened as are my legs. trying to explain this to an old friend in the pub just now with my speech so badly affected left me depressed and him confused. where does this stop?
It is certainly giving me a kicking at the moment, I have never felt so fu*king tired and old. why the *?....... just say it shall we.... FUCKING... there you all know what meant anyway!
One hour to my CT scan so now to sleep perchance to dream
Now 12 hours later all much chirpier and fairly symptom free.
I had my scan and I am hoping that I might be considered for a Thymectomy (removal of my Thymus gland).
I seem to satisfy the criteria as this is a reasonably developed case of mg, I am healthy and under 60 years old.
Whilst I have read that this is not a cure, it does offer the possibility of reduced symptoms and drug therapy.
Although a serious operation, particularly if they go for complete removal (by opening at my sternum), with a long recovery time, I would be prepared to take the risk versus benefit gamble.
I surveyed the last part of my friend's pub yesterday in order to complete my first post mg drawing.
It feels strange to be drawing again after all that has happened and although I am slower at both measuring and drawing I can still do it.
So a small victory.
A small victory is not I am hoping for later today, when I go to see my friend 'Duggy' AKA Mark Douglas box someones lips off in Milton Keynes.
He is one seriously focused fighter who has recovered well from a dislocated shoulder suffered a couple of years ago during a fight at York Hall. He boxed on for a few minutes and continued to use his dislocated shoulder to punch!
This is his 3rd Pro comeback fight and all is looking good for him.
I wonder what draws me to martial arts (and yes boxing is a fine martial art), I think it is that life has become so sanitised, controlled and lacking in drama, that MMA Boxing Brazilian Jui Jitsu and of course Judo offer the kind of visceral excitement missing from daily existence.
There is a chance to really understand yourself at a fundamental level when you are tested in these circumstances and my stumbling return to practicing judo last Wednesday was, I hope my first step back to an eventual return to competition.
C'mon you steroids.......... (picks up an England flag and bare chested, with arms splayed begins throwing plastic chairs up a high street somewhere in Belgium)
Go Duggie go DUGGIE, DO IM SON......DO IM!
Zen Buddhism anyone?
Friday, 19 July 2013
Chapter 14 All quiet on the Denton Front
Hello old friend,
I should now be driving to my bank in Reading in order to pay in the pitiful pile of cheques I have,
but I got the urge and the urge cannot be ignored so here I am blogging instead.... oh how young hip and trendy have I become with 'me bloggin' an 'me tweetin' .
In all, the gap between Chapter 13 and 14, could best be described as variable,
this admittedly sounds more like a weather forecast than a life, but it pretty much sums it up.
On the plus side, I have continued my fasting diet which is fantastic and has reduced my weight to 92 kg from
98 kg in two weeks. It is a good feeling to be in control of at least this part of my body!
I also managed my first judo session last Wednesday and whilst I was clearly a lot weaker in my arms and legs (yes it has arrived there now) my judo was as good as before (namely crap! .....only joshing Mrs Viv I'm really good at Judo.... did I tell you about the time...blah....blah). Here is me looking splendid as I win the London Open almost exactly a year ago....
With reduced strength and weight I was forced to move more efficiently, using my opponents movement to set up my attacks. This will be familiar to those of you who practice, I was forced to do better judo!
Only in judo could a loss of strength result in a potentially better performance,
lucky I am not a weight lifter eh?
You at the back I hope your taking notes there will be questions at the end
SO CONCENTRATE!
My friend, (and I hope by now) yours, Doctor Armstrong saw me on Monday.
This was despite the best efforts of the system which had booked my appointment for 2014.... I walked in at midday and apologised for being early, unaware that I was actually 1 year and half an hour early!
He seems to disdain the structures around him and bureaucracy in the way that I love to, walking out into reception and inviting me in like an old friend, despite me not having an appointment.
His upbeat assessment of my progress to date filled me with optimism, he after all is the one with 'trained eyes'.
He suggested that my steroid treatment might end as soon as 6 months from now rather than the possible 18 months that he had warned me may be the case.
I am definitely feeling better on the days when I take my steroid doses which is a sign that they are working, although the strange tiredness has now reached my arms and in particular my right shoulder (my hand is struggling with the effort of typing this). I feel like it wanders around my body like a naughty child picking it's targets... first left eye then right, sometimes mouth.... occasionally breathing...... seems to be quite strong in his arms mmmmm.... take that shitbag not so strong now eh?
Well you know what?
I'm not the shitbag in this, dear mg (no proper noun capitals for you) YOU ARE!
You may gain the odd victory but I will beat you.
I gave a judo demonstration at a lovely local school fete last Sunday and the mg did it's level best to make it's dark mischief......
After the disease has caused the bottom to fall out of your world, the drug treatment allows for the possibility
of the world falling out of your bottom......
Not a symptom I had suffered until (you guessed) Sunday!
Horror of horrors, it was a baking hot, sun seared and dusty afternoon, I was on the cusp of my speech impediment and with no microphone available, I was forced to shout at a crowd of confused adults as my fantastic little warriors gave their best.......
I had already discussed the awful possibilities of this situation with my son George earlier in the day....
Imagine the scene.... as I give a brief introduction to the history of Judo.... "In 1878 an, educationist Dr Kano...... blah.....devised a system of self defence and...... blahh blahhh.... meaning that today judo is enjoyed by children all over the world", ripple of applause......tttttthhhhbbbbbbbshhhhrrrrrrpppp sppplaaaat ttthrbbb (at this point my spotless judo trousers begin to grow what appears to be a small brown map of Gibralta.....
No wait! it's growing.... it's not Gibralta it's Africa!.... what is that horrid smell?
I fall forward face first into the mat finally silenced as the audience scatters, children are clutched to their mother's chests as they run.... don't look Timmy the poor judo man is having an 'accident'.
It didn't happen of course but it was a close run thing and fortunately it appears to have been a one off
(until the next time sniggers mg in the background).
Scan tomorrow as the CT Scanner broke down on Tuesday,
To Infinity and (down a bit up a lot) Beyond!
I should now be driving to my bank in Reading in order to pay in the pitiful pile of cheques I have,
but I got the urge and the urge cannot be ignored so here I am blogging instead.... oh how young hip and trendy have I become with 'me bloggin' an 'me tweetin' .
In all, the gap between Chapter 13 and 14, could best be described as variable,
this admittedly sounds more like a weather forecast than a life, but it pretty much sums it up.
On the plus side, I have continued my fasting diet which is fantastic and has reduced my weight to 92 kg from
98 kg in two weeks. It is a good feeling to be in control of at least this part of my body!
I also managed my first judo session last Wednesday and whilst I was clearly a lot weaker in my arms and legs (yes it has arrived there now) my judo was as good as before (namely crap! .....only joshing Mrs Viv I'm really good at Judo.... did I tell you about the time...blah....blah). Here is me looking splendid as I win the London Open almost exactly a year ago....
With reduced strength and weight I was forced to move more efficiently, using my opponents movement to set up my attacks. This will be familiar to those of you who practice, I was forced to do better judo!
Only in judo could a loss of strength result in a potentially better performance,
lucky I am not a weight lifter eh?
You at the back I hope your taking notes there will be questions at the end
SO CONCENTRATE!
My friend, (and I hope by now) yours, Doctor Armstrong saw me on Monday.
This was despite the best efforts of the system which had booked my appointment for 2014.... I walked in at midday and apologised for being early, unaware that I was actually 1 year and half an hour early!
He seems to disdain the structures around him and bureaucracy in the way that I love to, walking out into reception and inviting me in like an old friend, despite me not having an appointment.
His upbeat assessment of my progress to date filled me with optimism, he after all is the one with 'trained eyes'.
He suggested that my steroid treatment might end as soon as 6 months from now rather than the possible 18 months that he had warned me may be the case.
I am definitely feeling better on the days when I take my steroid doses which is a sign that they are working, although the strange tiredness has now reached my arms and in particular my right shoulder (my hand is struggling with the effort of typing this). I feel like it wanders around my body like a naughty child picking it's targets... first left eye then right, sometimes mouth.... occasionally breathing...... seems to be quite strong in his arms mmmmm.... take that shitbag not so strong now eh?
Well you know what?
I'm not the shitbag in this, dear mg (no proper noun capitals for you) YOU ARE!
You may gain the odd victory but I will beat you.
I gave a judo demonstration at a lovely local school fete last Sunday and the mg did it's level best to make it's dark mischief......
After the disease has caused the bottom to fall out of your world, the drug treatment allows for the possibility
of the world falling out of your bottom......
Not a symptom I had suffered until (you guessed) Sunday!
Horror of horrors, it was a baking hot, sun seared and dusty afternoon, I was on the cusp of my speech impediment and with no microphone available, I was forced to shout at a crowd of confused adults as my fantastic little warriors gave their best.......
I had already discussed the awful possibilities of this situation with my son George earlier in the day....
Imagine the scene.... as I give a brief introduction to the history of Judo.... "In 1878 an, educationist Dr Kano...... blah.....devised a system of self defence and...... blahh blahhh.... meaning that today judo is enjoyed by children all over the world", ripple of applause......tttttthhhhbbbbbbbshhhhrrrrrrpppp sppplaaaat ttthrbbb (at this point my spotless judo trousers begin to grow what appears to be a small brown map of Gibralta.....
No wait! it's growing.... it's not Gibralta it's Africa!.... what is that horrid smell?
I fall forward face first into the mat finally silenced as the audience scatters, children are clutched to their mother's chests as they run.... don't look Timmy the poor judo man is having an 'accident'.
It didn't happen of course but it was a close run thing and fortunately it appears to have been a one off
(until the next time sniggers mg in the background).
Scan tomorrow as the CT Scanner broke down on Tuesday,
To Infinity and (down a bit up a lot) Beyond!
Tuesday, 9 July 2013
Chapter 13 Lucky for some
This blog is like a friend to me, just as my lovely Yasmin want's to explain everything to her 'Mouse', I feel the need to explain everything to my 'Blog'.
She is nearly 3 and I am 55 however....
So blog what drags me to you on a beautiful sunny Tuesday morning?
Well you see it's like this.....(sits back and pauses for dramatic effect).....
I decided to read Zeynep's book about fasting and was persuaded to try this for myself.
It recommends a diet that allows for 5 days regular eating, with 2 (non consecutive) days that include a 12 hour fast. My dad was a great advocate for his own, once a week fast, claiming it made him feel much better generally.
This book proposes that potentially great benefits can be gained from fasting, beyond the obvious one of weight loss and control.
The author started his 2 day fast / 5 day eating plan with a fairly radical 4 day fast. This followed various tests on his blood etc. and physical measurements.
It was also supervised carefully by a doctor.
Without this safety net and, given that I am currently on treatment for MG, I have decided a cautious 2 day fast, before I start the 2 day 5 day routine.
I am well into my second day and I am feeling great, not hungry but very alert and sharp.
Today was one of my steroid days and the ramped dose today reached 40mg, Doctor Armstrong suggested that I would recognise the point when the steroid treatment started to take effect as I would feel better on the days when I took the dose. It seems early for this to be the case as he suggested this might be 6 weeks in but I feel so much better so is it the fast or is it the drugs?
Well Sherlock who gives a shit! The fact is I am feeling so much better, better than I have since this was diagnosed!!
Being me and still stinging from my pathetic attempt at Kettlebells on Sunday I have just finished a light practice set with a single 16kg kettlebell and...... FANTASTIC I feel normal!!!
No asthma, good fresh sweat rolling down my back, life is good. So dear u100kg division don't start counting your chickens because I'm still here and I think,
I will be coming for you soon...............
She is nearly 3 and I am 55 however....
So blog what drags me to you on a beautiful sunny Tuesday morning?
Well you see it's like this.....(sits back and pauses for dramatic effect).....
I decided to read Zeynep's book about fasting and was persuaded to try this for myself.
It recommends a diet that allows for 5 days regular eating, with 2 (non consecutive) days that include a 12 hour fast. My dad was a great advocate for his own, once a week fast, claiming it made him feel much better generally.
This book proposes that potentially great benefits can be gained from fasting, beyond the obvious one of weight loss and control.
The author started his 2 day fast / 5 day eating plan with a fairly radical 4 day fast. This followed various tests on his blood etc. and physical measurements.
It was also supervised carefully by a doctor.
Without this safety net and, given that I am currently on treatment for MG, I have decided a cautious 2 day fast, before I start the 2 day 5 day routine.
I am well into my second day and I am feeling great, not hungry but very alert and sharp.
Today was one of my steroid days and the ramped dose today reached 40mg, Doctor Armstrong suggested that I would recognise the point when the steroid treatment started to take effect as I would feel better on the days when I took the dose. It seems early for this to be the case as he suggested this might be 6 weeks in but I feel so much better so is it the fast or is it the drugs?
Well Sherlock who gives a shit! The fact is I am feeling so much better, better than I have since this was diagnosed!!
Being me and still stinging from my pathetic attempt at Kettlebells on Sunday I have just finished a light practice set with a single 16kg kettlebell and...... FANTASTIC I feel normal!!!
No asthma, good fresh sweat rolling down my back, life is good. So dear u100kg division don't start counting your chickens because I'm still here and I think,
I will be coming for you soon...............
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