Chapter 19 The End of the Beginning?

My Dear blog,
I hope that this fine and sunny Thursday finds you in good spirits?
I am in a slightly euphoric mood (read manically positive), because my reliance on Mestinon the drug that alleviates the symptoms of MG is dwindling fast as the steroids do their job.
On a steroid day I now only seem to need between 2 and 4 tablets and on non steroid days no more than 4.
The maximum dose of 7.5 tablets was a regular dose not long ago and as I take them up to this limit on an 'as needed' basis they remain a good indicator of what level of symptom I am facing.

To help me decide whether the MG had finished my contest career a couple of weeks ago I entered a small competition in Salisbury, entering the masters U90kg section. In retrospect it was an unrealistic test of my
reduced potential as I had not trained for a couple of months I had dropped a lot of weight in a short period and having sweated off the last Kilo in the sauna to make weight at 9am I then had to wait until 4pm to compete. With only 3 fights available in my group I agreed to fight an Under 100kg and an over 100kg competitor. This was ok in pricipal but they made my first fight the fatty open weight person.
I use the term person in a loose fashion scowling bristly tub of lard would be more accurate.
He had very strong and negative Judo with very little in the way of attacking technique.
I should have opened him up with movement and a high tempo but rustiness on my part meant that I attacked with an overly optimistic shoulder throw which he blocked so forcefully I damaged my left elbow.
Unable to grip with my left hand a difficult task became impossible and I lost to a hold down., submitting rather than suffer the indignity of laying under a beached whale. The next fight was against the U100kg fighter* *(note the term fighter not 'player' a term now seemingly adopted by commentators and even coaches in some misguided attempt to make judo feel more like other sports, boxers don't 'play' boxing they do it. Footballers don't 'do' football they play it. while I'm still in brackets FFS please stop calling Judoka or if you like Judo fighters 'athletes', it is a crass dumbing down and plays to the idea that we should broaden its appeal to get more money into it. They presumably think that if they can blur the edges enough it might at some point become as popular as track and field events, it wont by the way. To enjoy judo it is necessary to invest time in understanding it, educating the audience might be a better idea. Failing this I am determined to start a campaign devoted to changing the term 'athlete' where applied to track and field into 'fighters' long jumpers will be known as 'long jump fighters'. There.... perhaps my longest use of brackets ever, now where was I? Nurse..... Nurse...I need help!). and club mate Geoff Torrington within seconds I realised that I was still unable to grip effectivly and with nothing to gain from a protracted battle, I whispered to him that I was about to gift him his 2nd Dan by way of a 'jump'. He threw me with a low Seoi Nage that I underlined with an enormous breakfall. This got a round of applause from the audience and.... to my shame, I wanted to shout at all of them and explain that I had jumped (still the spoilt over competitive child at heart),

any way I didn't
explain....

and he did,
get his remaining 10 points against a higher grade and his second Dan.

So that's all right then?

NO OF COURSE IT ISN'T!

I was so depressed that my competitive judo was at an end that I made the mistake of posting my thoughts on Facebook. This got got so many people telling me to fight on / get a grip / man up etc.
It was as far as I was concerned a decision being forced on me by this disease, after 43 years and with coaching my priority was it really such a bad idea to stop, was it not my business (yes so why put on a public message board then)?   The fact is now that I have had chance to digest all of this, I think that there were too many things in the mix for me to be able to make a reasonable decision about post MG competition. So take out the other factors .... train and prepare for the Nationals at my new weight... make the weight before the event not on the day....refuse to fight out of my weight group unless ()crucially) its after my U90kg fights.

Last night at Pinewood Judo Club I felt really alive in a way that is difficult to explain, I think it
was probably that I was, for the first time practicing judo in a 'normal' non diseased way. I honestly couldn't notice any of the weakness or fuzziness that MG brings. This made me feel like I was boosted beyond normal, to a higher level. My long time friend and judo training partner Paul Knight said he could feel no evidence of the disease in me either and said he thought it had "gone away".

It made me realise that, when you have trained for 43 years on a weekly basis with someone, you get to know their body through movement almost as an extension of your own.

My weight reduction (sorry GP your predicted moon face and steroid weight gain is still nowhere to be seen)
has made me more mobile and add that to my normality high and I was on fire in Randori (free sparring).... not literally on fire of course, that would be silly

Watching the Judo World Championships which are being live streamed from Rio has been fantastic over the last few days and.... having flirted with MMA and BJJ (mixed martial arts and Brazilian Jui Jitsu)
the pause forced on me by MG gave me a great chance to step back and consider everything objectively.

Now, tired of acronyms I have returned to my one true love.....

JUDO!
shout it from the mountain tops

JUDO!
spray it on car park walls

JUDO!
tattoo it on your foreheads

So with only three weeks left to the Nationals and one embarrassing performance in Salisbury to put away
watch this space.



Now back to Rio........